Parenting after Separation and Divorce
Effective Parenting after separation or divorce is both difficult and critical. The outcomes for children from single parent households are statically a disaster for the children concerned.
Co-Parenting Skills
‘A horse created by committee is a camel’.
Co-parenting does not mean that each parent has to agree with the other in all matters concerning their children. Nor does it mean that each parent has to gain approval from the other .
Co-Parenting is a cooperative situation in which both parents understands that their children need a healthy relation with their parents and will do their best to facilitate that within reason.
It does not mean forcing children into unhealthy relationships.
Forcing parents to parent in the approved way of the other parent.
Instead it recognises that parents are individuals, each with their own personalities and parenting styles and that males and females generally parent differently.
Parental Alienation
Vengeance
Toxic or hateful ex-spouses
Spoiling and Neglect
Compensation
Bad-cop Parenting
It is often the case that following the separation or divorce of parents, one parent will either struggle to adapt or continue to maintain the same role that they had whilst the parents were a couple.
It is inappropriate for one parent, to take on the disciplinary role in the absence of the other parent’s willingness or ability to do so.
Ineffectual Parenting
Misbehaving Children
Following the separation of parents the behaviour of effected children is often varies from parent to parent and from time to time.
Generally normal behaviour that degrades when returning from a visit with the other parent.
Generally normal with one parent and out of control with the other.
Abandonment
Abuse
Abuse – definition
No parent should encourage a child to see an abusive parent. Children should have the right to see their parents, however, an abusive parent should have no right to inflict themselves upon a child.